Wednesday, 30 March 2016

2016 Quarter Way Through

So a few months ago 2016 was a new shiny year filled with all the new clean slate to promise yourself that this year will be the year you get fit/travel more/settle down/save money or whatever cliche resolution we all subscribe to but don't do. Now its nearly April which means a quarter of 2016 has gone so surely we should be a quarter of the way towards those goals? I have other less cliche and more personal goals too but I would prefer to keep them private. So how am I doing with the cliches?

Well I travel a lot anyway, that's more of a ongoing life mission than a specific goal.

Settle down? Well that was 2 years ago's goal and after a year of dating hard I realised that you cant force that type of thing and I should work on the relationship I have by myself which to be honest was a much better lesson to have learnt! I should probably blog about that sometime.

Saving money is something that I never had to think about before because when you're a student and you don't have any money then you can't save. Recently I have been considering what my financial future should be because it's the first time I could practically think about that. Even if it was just a few pounds a week everything would add up... hopefully.

Now that leaves get fit. This is something that I've never given much concern too because I've always been fairly active, I always had either a gym membership or a sports club I was training with, I also lived in the city center and walked everywhere, likewise I had an active job that had me running around all day sometimes literally running! So exercise wasn't something I was ever short of.

However all that is different now. I still train with a sports club, but I've moved house and now bus everywhere and my job has shifted to a desk role. I was expecting to loose a bit of fitness and put on a little weight but recently I have been avoiding finding out by how much. I didn't notice at first, I brushed off not doing pilates much by being busy, likewise I dropped training sessions, I created excuses when people invited me to come running or climbing or whatever it was. I would try to make healthy choices with what I eat but then because I have veggies in the fridge at home I've let myself pick up a bacon roll on my way to work or to pick up a chocolate bar from the drawer whenever I go to the kettle to get a coffee. Bad habits have crept up with theses shifts and suddenly I find myself even afraid to see how unfit I have become.

I took the first step last weekend which ironically was a literal step: I stepped onto the scales. Now muscle is 18% denser than fat (apparently, having just googled it - I thought it was five times denser not a fifth denser so I've learnt something) so putting on weight and getting less fit is pretty impressive when you think about it because you have to put on enough fat to cover not only the weight of the muscle you have lost but more than that to cause the weight gain.

Be that as it may I now know half of the damage, there's just the question of how much fitness I have lost. I am determined to undo my bad habits and both eat better and get back into exercising more; say yes to things and stop snacking at work; stop going backwards and start going forwards!

Maybe after the Easter chocolate is gone though.


Thursday, 17 March 2016

Forwards and Backwards

I've been rather quiet recently. I usually don't like to blog without a conclusion for a train of thought or at least a point to convey. Blog posts that don't impart anything more then a question mostly annoy me so I try to avoid those. This isn't a dialogue usually otherwise I would post to a messageboard therefore I think of this blog as a series of short essays more than anything.
The penguin who wants to fly from "Up and Down" by Oliver Jeffers

The trouble is that recently I have been feeling both frustrated by the lack of movement in certain aspects of my life while other aspects of my life have totally changed beyond recognition. In the last week alone I have had some incredibly positive and negative influences ontop of some other ongoing issues I am realigning myself to.

Can you simultaneously be bored and overwhelmed with your own life? I seem to be. Have you ever been in one of those funhouse rides at carnivals? The ones where one of your feet shoots forwards and the other shoots backwards and you have to struggle forwards without either doing the splits or faceplanting the floor hard enough to loose teeth! Well so far I have avoided needing substantial dental work but it is frustrating not to have both feet on the same step going in the same direction. I wouldn't want everything to stay still mind you, that would be really dull, but moving simultaneously in one direction would be preferable. Or would it? Maybe that would feel unstable too.

Remember my post about winds of change? Well in that I spoke about how if you were a kite, some things/people keep you grounded and in one place like a tether rock, but some other things/people move you like a wind. I think there is now a third option. There are things that not only weigh you down but also can move you backwards so unlike a wind blowing you backwards or in a direction you weren't expecting, I would like to introduce a new aspect to the metaphore; a rock rolling down a hill.

This rock I wasn't expecting to be tethered to indefinitely and it's a rock that's in a breezy place so it had the added bonus of that, however it seems to have shifted and now be falling. But at the same time I have a new wind supporting me. I don't think I am actually moving anywhere that quickly but it's putting a lot of stress on me to be both pulled down and pushed up at the same time. I'm only a little kite after all.